The air
is ringing.
The quiet
singing.
It's trapping
by setting me free.
The cold
is hurting.
The window's
flirting,
giving off and icy breeze.
The air, so still.
It feels so stale.
I stay hiding,
I stay smiling,
inside-
tanning pale.
I'll hide my face,
from the storm.
I won't for much longer.
Keep me warm.
Saturday, November 27, 2010
Green Apple
There you are, smirking at me-
like you know, like you see.
Like you can understand
anything besides a man.
Across the room in your fancy chair,
I move away you just-
stand there.
I feel as though you are undressing,
it's too much.
I am confessing.
But I'm intrigued and miss this game,
shooting stars could make me feel the same!
Recite the alphabet.
Retrace your name.
Remember the day we met?
Same, not the same.
Little kids laughing,
computer screens flashing.
It wasn't me, it's you.
It's just the things you do,
I fed it to you.
I fed it to you.
Now we're driving in your car.
It's just the way you are,
but I'm falling for you.
Let go for round two.
I'll get the scissors and glue,
you just do that thing you do.
Baby let's move.
Maybe it's because I've been drinking
All. The. Time.
Maybe it's that I don't believe in,
Butterflies.
Maybe it's that I'm too lazy,
maybe I'm too scared.
But either or it's not for me to pick and choose
you're not supposed to be prepared.
Which way do I turn?
What now should I do?
I knew exactly which direction I was spinning
Until the bottle landed on you.
Now where do I go?
When I'm gone you're always here.
Feel my heartbeat? Good.
Because I feel I may disappear.
Disappear.
Fireworks keep shooting,
and polluting my sky!
If i can't see up, then how on earth can I decided?
Why am I moving at all?
Will you catch you tongue?
You don't have anything yet!
Darling you're still young!
You have nothing!
You have nothing!
But hold on.
Hold on for him,
hold on for us.
Hold on, when everything's gone
you'll be the only sacrilegious.
Stand up for what you want,
what you believe in too.
Hell yeah, I'm an atheist,
God Bless You.
Magic moving, in a little box.
Looking to that day.
My moments taking place,
only time we'll waste.
Send me your hours,
send me an email
let's talk on the phone.
Living in stepping stones,
these last minutes-
this is my only home.
like you know, like you see.
Like you can understand
anything besides a man.
Across the room in your fancy chair,
I move away you just-
stand there.
I feel as though you are undressing,
it's too much.
I am confessing.
But I'm intrigued and miss this game,
shooting stars could make me feel the same!
Recite the alphabet.
Retrace your name.
Remember the day we met?
Same, not the same.
Little kids laughing,
computer screens flashing.
It wasn't me, it's you.
It's just the things you do,
I fed it to you.
I fed it to you.
Now we're driving in your car.
It's just the way you are,
but I'm falling for you.
Let go for round two.
I'll get the scissors and glue,
you just do that thing you do.
Baby let's move.
Maybe it's because I've been drinking
All. The. Time.
Maybe it's that I don't believe in,
Butterflies.
Maybe it's that I'm too lazy,
maybe I'm too scared.
But either or it's not for me to pick and choose
you're not supposed to be prepared.
Which way do I turn?
What now should I do?
I knew exactly which direction I was spinning
Until the bottle landed on you.
Now where do I go?
When I'm gone you're always here.
Feel my heartbeat? Good.
Because I feel I may disappear.
Disappear.
Fireworks keep shooting,
and polluting my sky!
If i can't see up, then how on earth can I decided?
Why am I moving at all?
Will you catch you tongue?
You don't have anything yet!
Darling you're still young!
You have nothing!
You have nothing!
But hold on.
Hold on for him,
hold on for us.
Hold on, when everything's gone
you'll be the only sacrilegious.
Stand up for what you want,
what you believe in too.
Hell yeah, I'm an atheist,
God Bless You.
Magic moving, in a little box.
Looking to that day.
My moments taking place,
only time we'll waste.
Send me your hours,
send me an email
let's talk on the phone.
Living in stepping stones,
these last minutes-
this is my only home.
Saturday, November 20, 2010
Color me.
Hide- hide,
inside the box- inside.
You touch me, so I breathe.
You touch me, without reach.
Hide- hide,
because it's so soon!
Actually we're all so late,
tick-tock tick-tock chimes the clock all night
It's never too early to complicate!
Hide- hide
your scarlet letter, my purple heart
burn the night away...
Hide- hide,
it's overcast with wind and rain,
little angels flying holding words that don't mean
anything.
color me. color me. color me.
Hide- hide,
but you won't let me.
but you push me to the edge.
every time I think I'm fine you get me,
all over again.
spell out my name and make me crazy
read it out and melt me- like you do.
speak softly, pull my hair, sing to me,
throw me, hold me, i know you.
just watch the clock,
just watch the sky,
cross your fingers,
I promise,
I won't hide.
inside the box- inside.
You touch me, so I breathe.
You touch me, without reach.
Hide- hide,
because it's so soon!
Actually we're all so late,
tick-tock tick-tock chimes the clock all night
It's never too early to complicate!
Hide- hide
your scarlet letter, my purple heart
burn the night away...
Hide- hide,
it's overcast with wind and rain,
little angels flying holding words that don't mean
anything.
color me. color me. color me.
Hide- hide,
but you won't let me.
but you push me to the edge.
every time I think I'm fine you get me,
all over again.
spell out my name and make me crazy
read it out and melt me- like you do.
speak softly, pull my hair, sing to me,
throw me, hold me, i know you.
just watch the clock,
just watch the sky,
cross your fingers,
I promise,
I won't hide.
Sunday, October 10, 2010
Lily Lily.
I'm not sure, but i sure know for certain-
they'll all fake a smile when we draw the curtain.
I'll just smile and wave,
like I'm made up of plastic.
And they'll all cheer and clap
like I'm fucking fantastic.
Arrogance flowing- out through their noses,
Poisons all painted- arranged with the roses.
And all of their colors, drip down to the middle,
it's funny how evil presents it'self so little.
there egos are flying and hormones are raging,
watch out for misfire while the gun's disengaging.
Everyone's seeing red so they run to the prozac,
But it won't help much since they're already on that.
systems shut down, and we face our reflection
people can't even tell they're in the wrong direction
don't give out your thoughts for people will steal them,
but i wonder if it counts if they can also feel them.
strangers are pissed- knocking down my front door.
i'm not going to answer, i can't even hear it- anymore.
i'll just keep on callin,
and stalling,
and stalling...
i guess i'm just not sure.
they'll all fake a smile when we draw the curtain.
I'll just smile and wave,
like I'm made up of plastic.
And they'll all cheer and clap
like I'm fucking fantastic.
Arrogance flowing- out through their noses,
Poisons all painted- arranged with the roses.
And all of their colors, drip down to the middle,
it's funny how evil presents it'self so little.
there egos are flying and hormones are raging,
watch out for misfire while the gun's disengaging.
Everyone's seeing red so they run to the prozac,
But it won't help much since they're already on that.
systems shut down, and we face our reflection
people can't even tell they're in the wrong direction
don't give out your thoughts for people will steal them,
but i wonder if it counts if they can also feel them.
strangers are pissed- knocking down my front door.
i'm not going to answer, i can't even hear it- anymore.
i'll just keep on callin,
and stalling,
and stalling...
i guess i'm just not sure.
Sunday, September 26, 2010
Her Paramour
the bandit with the sparkley smile-
sneaking through the night,
strong hands, and eyes that beguile,
looking for a fight.
Footsteps left leading up and up-
through dirt, and rock, and sand.
like the trail would never end.
thats where it all began.
she was shaking, hearts were racing-
but it was zero gravity from there.
so she let herself go and let her self fall,
and felt the wind rush through her hair.
felt that feeling in her stomach, that sickly tumble of butterflies.
she felt her chest beat louder,
for once-
she felt alive.
a perfect puzzle formed on the edge of his arms ending with his fingertips,
that she was a part of,
and she'd give her heart up,
to forever just- do this.
it's true, she had fallen hard into a trap of his,
but at the same time tangled herself up in a more dangerous web of her own.
and she wanted nothing more than to stay there,
and to make his heart her home.
but the clocks ticked,
and their watches chimed,
and the earth shook real slow.
slow enough for love.
fast enough to not be able to let it go.
early one day she sat where he slept,
with a heavy heart, unable to even think.
she kissed his cheek and scrawled down
her words to him in black ink.
and in that moment she signed away her soul,
she gave him all of her,
and gave him all control. ..
the connection they have is so beautiful,
the closest thing i've ever seen to perfection,
a perfection she's never before believed in,
but he-
is her only exception.
sneaking through the night,
strong hands, and eyes that beguile,
looking for a fight.
Footsteps left leading up and up-
through dirt, and rock, and sand.
like the trail would never end.
thats where it all began.
she was shaking, hearts were racing-
but it was zero gravity from there.
so she let herself go and let her self fall,
and felt the wind rush through her hair.
felt that feeling in her stomach, that sickly tumble of butterflies.
she felt her chest beat louder,
for once-
she felt alive.
a perfect puzzle formed on the edge of his arms ending with his fingertips,
that she was a part of,
and she'd give her heart up,
to forever just- do this.
it's true, she had fallen hard into a trap of his,
but at the same time tangled herself up in a more dangerous web of her own.
and she wanted nothing more than to stay there,
and to make his heart her home.
but the clocks ticked,
and their watches chimed,
and the earth shook real slow.
slow enough for love.
fast enough to not be able to let it go.
early one day she sat where he slept,
with a heavy heart, unable to even think.
she kissed his cheek and scrawled down
her words to him in black ink.
and in that moment she signed away her soul,
she gave him all of her,
and gave him all control. ..
the connection they have is so beautiful,
the closest thing i've ever seen to perfection,
a perfection she's never before believed in,
but he-
is her only exception.
When..
when you can feel each others heartbeat-
from miles and miles away,
when you can talk and talk forever-
without having anything to say,
when you can't stand one moment-
of being angry or mad,
when you hurt as well,
when they feel sad,
when being together-
just makes sense.
and lonely Saturdays-
are all past tense,
when you know just whats-
going on inside their head,
when you are with someone else-
you wish it was them instead,
when you tell them everything-
even of what your ashamed,
you have a million inside jokes,
a million nicknames.
so many memories-
to many to count,
every picture a story, or how that day went,
every weekend- and adventure,
oh how it could be spent,
when you have it all and more,
and then others just pretent,
you know you've found them,
and you love them,
they're forever.
bestfriend.
from miles and miles away,
when you can talk and talk forever-
without having anything to say,
when you can't stand one moment-
of being angry or mad,
when you hurt as well,
when they feel sad,
when being together-
just makes sense.
and lonely Saturdays-
are all past tense,
when you know just whats-
going on inside their head,
when you are with someone else-
you wish it was them instead,
when you tell them everything-
even of what your ashamed,
you have a million inside jokes,
a million nicknames.
so many memories-
to many to count,
every picture a story, or how that day went,
every weekend- and adventure,
oh how it could be spent,
when you have it all and more,
and then others just pretent,
you know you've found them,
and you love them,
they're forever.
bestfriend.
Thursday, August 19, 2010
Just Love.
just love.
love often.
love crazy.
love passionatley.
love many.
love hard.
love soft.
love gently.
love constantly.
love all.
love everything.
love everything.
love with everything.
love warmly.
love sweetly.
love like music.
love like water.
love like chocolate.
love with all you have.
love with all you are.
love your neighbor.
love your mother.
love yourself.
love loving.
love more.
just love.
love often.
love crazy.
love passionatley.
love many.
love hard.
love soft.
love gently.
love constantly.
love all.
love everything.
love everything.
love with everything.
love warmly.
love sweetly.
love like music.
love like water.
love like chocolate.
love with all you have.
love with all you are.
love your neighbor.
love your mother.
love yourself.
love loving.
love more.
just love.
1005
you destroy me,
you create me.
tanatalize and intoxicate me.
purge me of my fear and sorrow,
love me today,
still love me tomorw.
i'll hold my breath and jump under-
underneath the ice.
it terrifies me to let go like this,
but there isn't really much time to think twice.
stop my shivers.
stop my fear.
keep me grounded.
pull me near.
i may lack the approval seal but
you can't shy away from whats real,
you can't ignore it, you can't fight it,
you cant deny how you feel.
this is it.
and i've cashed it all in.
so let me burn in hell if loving you's a sin.
if you know what you want but still you have doubt,
you put one foot in and your already scheming your way out.
just dive in head first to the shallow end-
and let your body feel the hard floor.
bruised-
and bleeding-
from your head lieing there wanting more.
it'll warp the whole way you think.
bottle life up,
grit your teeth,
take a drink.
once you hear what i'm ranting about,
understand what i'm talking about,
it'll be such a pretty view.
all of the colors in the world.
i will show them to you.
you create me.
tanatalize and intoxicate me.
purge me of my fear and sorrow,
love me today,
still love me tomorw.
i'll hold my breath and jump under-
underneath the ice.
it terrifies me to let go like this,
but there isn't really much time to think twice.
stop my shivers.
stop my fear.
keep me grounded.
pull me near.
i may lack the approval seal but
you can't shy away from whats real,
you can't ignore it, you can't fight it,
you cant deny how you feel.
this is it.
and i've cashed it all in.
so let me burn in hell if loving you's a sin.
if you know what you want but still you have doubt,
you put one foot in and your already scheming your way out.
just dive in head first to the shallow end-
and let your body feel the hard floor.
bruised-
and bleeding-
from your head lieing there wanting more.
it'll warp the whole way you think.
bottle life up,
grit your teeth,
take a drink.
once you hear what i'm ranting about,
understand what i'm talking about,
it'll be such a pretty view.
all of the colors in the world.
i will show them to you.
Wednesday, August 18, 2010
Plain Rice
these slippery sidewalks
I've created.
"let me stay!"
sticky pavement
growing underneath the trees
"i just hate that place."
orange railroads
trailing side by side by side
empty mailbox
i guess I'm just along for the ride.
but it's kinda funny-
how in a few days it can all go away.
and in a few days
you're glad you couldn't stay.
and in a few days-
things could be this way.
i think you should know;
I'm afraid to sing in front of noisy crowds
or nosey people,
or, people with noses.
people sometimes look at me,
but they all say they have hands as well.
they wear pants as well,
they all dance as well.
and most don't hold my glance so well.
i figured it would all be the same.
icy breath on the window frame.
drip drop- drip drop. goes the icy rain.
i shiver and shiver in my chair.
and wish my hands weren't so empty,
and wish my arms weren't so bare,
i sing love songs in the shower
and laugh when i fall down
and i cover my face when i wake up.
but only when your around.
driving down those long roads my heart seemed heavy
my eyes seemed full
and it all spilled out because i let it all down and i opened up like i wouldn't think i would.
silly girl you drone on to much.
always about that silly little thing.
my face is wet but it's not the same
and my mouth is curved but,
in a flip-flop sort of way.
my torso- feel so light with you.
my naval- feels so odd with you.
twice have i died- bring me back to life.
Bring me, back to life.
show me- how to live like you.
teach me- to see the way you do.
let me- also help you too.
because when I'm alive I'm so alive.
i tend to fret about little things.
i feel a bit scared of what war this brings.
like before- there were many things.
seasons change, and so do the leaves.
so whats stopping you from stopping me?
and I'll just be here squirming in my seat.
until once again i can feel your heart beat.
but when i die again,
if i die again-
I'm not sure when I'll wake again,
if i wake again.
but your voice is like sugar.
and your words are like honey.
and i get all funny.
and my days are getting dreary
and my nights are getting older
and that silly little thing is tapping on my shoulder.
and i want to sing along.
with it's silly little song.
sing with me.
sing with me.
sing with me.
I've created.
"let me stay!"
sticky pavement
growing underneath the trees
"i just hate that place."
orange railroads
trailing side by side by side
empty mailbox
i guess I'm just along for the ride.
but it's kinda funny-
how in a few days it can all go away.
and in a few days
you're glad you couldn't stay.
and in a few days-
things could be this way.
i think you should know;
I'm afraid to sing in front of noisy crowds
or nosey people,
or, people with noses.
people sometimes look at me,
but they all say they have hands as well.
they wear pants as well,
they all dance as well.
and most don't hold my glance so well.
i figured it would all be the same.
icy breath on the window frame.
drip drop- drip drop. goes the icy rain.
i shiver and shiver in my chair.
and wish my hands weren't so empty,
and wish my arms weren't so bare,
i sing love songs in the shower
and laugh when i fall down
and i cover my face when i wake up.
but only when your around.
driving down those long roads my heart seemed heavy
my eyes seemed full
and it all spilled out because i let it all down and i opened up like i wouldn't think i would.
silly girl you drone on to much.
always about that silly little thing.
my face is wet but it's not the same
and my mouth is curved but,
in a flip-flop sort of way.
my torso- feel so light with you.
my naval- feels so odd with you.
twice have i died- bring me back to life.
Bring me, back to life.
show me- how to live like you.
teach me- to see the way you do.
let me- also help you too.
because when I'm alive I'm so alive.
i tend to fret about little things.
i feel a bit scared of what war this brings.
like before- there were many things.
seasons change, and so do the leaves.
so whats stopping you from stopping me?
and I'll just be here squirming in my seat.
until once again i can feel your heart beat.
but when i die again,
if i die again-
I'm not sure when I'll wake again,
if i wake again.
but your voice is like sugar.
and your words are like honey.
and i get all funny.
and my days are getting dreary
and my nights are getting older
and that silly little thing is tapping on my shoulder.
and i want to sing along.
with it's silly little song.
sing with me.
sing with me.
sing with me.
Wednesday, July 28, 2010
Just Happy
The darkness dances around my eye sores,
My days have shifted.
The concept of time now confuses me.
But its all dust under the table.
Spilt milk, I suppose.
I jump off cliffs and run through fires,
Yet still I watch the ground only inches in front of me.
Still I feel for my back and feel up my spine,
It’s still there.
I’m still here.
But my naval is gone already,
My chest has left as well.
Where have they gone?
When will they be back?
I don’t care in the slightest.
With them they have taken memories
Of a shady past,
Memories I wish to forget.
They have takes my sadness away,
My confusion,
My loneliness.
Until all the remains
is happiness.
And I’m just happy.
And its simple.
And it’s fun.
And I smile more,
Laugh more,
And I’m just..
happy.
My days have shifted.
The concept of time now confuses me.
But its all dust under the table.
Spilt milk, I suppose.
I jump off cliffs and run through fires,
Yet still I watch the ground only inches in front of me.
Still I feel for my back and feel up my spine,
It’s still there.
I’m still here.
But my naval is gone already,
My chest has left as well.
Where have they gone?
When will they be back?
I don’t care in the slightest.
With them they have taken memories
Of a shady past,
Memories I wish to forget.
They have takes my sadness away,
My confusion,
My loneliness.
Until all the remains
is happiness.
And I’m just happy.
And its simple.
And it’s fun.
And I smile more,
Laugh more,
And I’m just..
happy.
Tuesday, July 13, 2010
The Wall
She touches the walls with her bare hands,
She forgot how to feel still,
The wall feels cool,
She realizes how hot she has been.
Her eyes are closed,
She know what this looks like.
She sits quietly because nothing more needs to be said.
She waits patiently,
Leaning against the wall,
She laughs to herself when she feels her naval fly away.
She smiles to herself when she feels her chest leave as well.
Faces surround her asking where he mind is.
She seems miles away.
I shake her and she dreamily speaks of how funny time is.
I wonder what time it is in her head.
I wonder if she notices the time going by.
I wonder if she cares.
So many different directions of criticism are coming toward her
She keeps her head up.
I feel bad for her.
But I know we all wish we we’re where she is.
No matter how far away we pull her,
She still wants to just sit with the wall.
Just sit, and be calm.
And be happy.
She needs to get her thoughts together.
What a mess that girl is.
Or was? Perhaps?
I fear that wall will one day fall,
What then would she do.
She’s to blind to think about this.
This old wall…
I wish I could slap her in the face and say “wake up!”
But I know she would only become very sad.
But she is so confused.
What position she puts herself in.
What a silly girl.
I hope that wall keeps her steady.
I hope it keeps her safe.
I have so much fear for her,
I care for her,
I want to protect her.
But secretly, I envy her.
I remember it was not so long, when I sat there,
Right there.
As well.
She forgot how to feel still,
The wall feels cool,
She realizes how hot she has been.
Her eyes are closed,
She know what this looks like.
She sits quietly because nothing more needs to be said.
She waits patiently,
Leaning against the wall,
She laughs to herself when she feels her naval fly away.
She smiles to herself when she feels her chest leave as well.
Faces surround her asking where he mind is.
She seems miles away.
I shake her and she dreamily speaks of how funny time is.
I wonder what time it is in her head.
I wonder if she notices the time going by.
I wonder if she cares.
So many different directions of criticism are coming toward her
She keeps her head up.
I feel bad for her.
But I know we all wish we we’re where she is.
No matter how far away we pull her,
She still wants to just sit with the wall.
Just sit, and be calm.
And be happy.
She needs to get her thoughts together.
What a mess that girl is.
Or was? Perhaps?
I fear that wall will one day fall,
What then would she do.
She’s to blind to think about this.
This old wall…
I wish I could slap her in the face and say “wake up!”
But I know she would only become very sad.
But she is so confused.
What position she puts herself in.
What a silly girl.
I hope that wall keeps her steady.
I hope it keeps her safe.
I have so much fear for her,
I care for her,
I want to protect her.
But secretly, I envy her.
I remember it was not so long, when I sat there,
Right there.
As well.
Friday, July 9, 2010
reflections..
Everything I seem to write is repetitive and has such emphasis on today. Could that be it’s only today? And tomorrow it will not be? Or does that mean ‘today’ as in today and on, today is the future, today is forever. But I said today and today is only today. And then am I repetitive because I’m stuck in this trend the trend I’m always in? Or repetitive because of the obvious? That I am simply.. Repeating? How can I know? Do I listen to my mind? Or listen to my heart? Even if I made that decision I couldn’t because I cant tell the two apart anymore. When I spell it out like this its so complicated but when I’m just there, and in the moment and feeling what I want and feeling what’s right, all the complications go away and I’m just happy. So happy. But how long will ‘there and in the moment’ last? How long before I become restless? How long before I hurt somebody I care about so deeply? How selfish I must be not to think about this but how ridiculous I must be to think it through this much and not to just let what is be. But isn’t up to me to stop what could be stopped, prevent a potential disaster? But who am I to stand in the way of something like this from happening? It’s happening without my insisting, it’s happening with out my persuasion, for the first time since the past time it’s just happening and who am I to stop it when it is exactly what I want? I contradict myself here but in my mind what I know to be the truth right now I don’t contradict myself at all. Which in the bigger picture is yet just another contradiction. What I know from my past is true. But, what I know from my present.. Is true as well. How do you decided between two truths? Which is truer? But how it was then.. And how it was now, is different. And that’s true.
Today
My heart and my mind
Intertwined today
At least a thousand times
Just today.
But am I blind?
I don’t feel blind
This feels real as day,
As bright as day
But today,
I’m scared.
The things I have to loose today.
I’m not at all prepared.
He happiness I receive,
Each day.
The breath I breath,
Each day,
Seemed so inconsequential
Yesterday.
But its all new,
And fresh and
Today,
Is a new day.
Intertwined today
At least a thousand times
Just today.
But am I blind?
I don’t feel blind
This feels real as day,
As bright as day
But today,
I’m scared.
The things I have to loose today.
I’m not at all prepared.
He happiness I receive,
Each day.
The breath I breath,
Each day,
Seemed so inconsequential
Yesterday.
But its all new,
And fresh and
Today,
Is a new day.
Sunday, May 23, 2010
(masquerade) "self destruction"
Bowing down to the poisons enveloping her youth,
Surrendering to the demons that seem to mask the truth,
Breaking all mirrors,
And clawing out her eyes,
She was always told her life lies there,
Her soul lies there.
Where her heart should be,
An empty hole,
For he took it from her, he snatched it away,
And ripped it in two and hissed which of these would be better for you.
Her face cracks, she has no tears to cry,Her eyes seem to only glimmer,
And her mouth is formed into a smile so perfect it seems artificial,
It seems dangerous,
Oh the depths of plastic, the unseen agony of it all.
A false sense of happiness is written across her face,
Masquerading around as if her life was real,
Abusing the terrain she worshiped,
Her reflection in water,
Shows her malfeasance easily, vibrantly in the light.
She seems to glow, but no one but me seems to know.
I pity her, if only she could see her self.
Infidelity tastes so sweet when you have a bitter tongue,
The mirror, the mind, the mouth and I,
All sat down for a cup of tea,
Let’s make small talk and smile awkwardly,
The dirt curls up under my toes, whispering “remember me?”
I looked at her and she looked at me,
I never saw her blink,
But in the blink of an eye,
I could lift it all of her shoulders.
Spin over my shoulder and let her off the hook.
But I think I’ll make her stay there.
I’ll just stand here and look.
Surrendering to the demons that seem to mask the truth,
Breaking all mirrors,
And clawing out her eyes,
She was always told her life lies there,
Her soul lies there.
Where her heart should be,
An empty hole,
For he took it from her, he snatched it away,
And ripped it in two and hissed which of these would be better for you.
Her face cracks, she has no tears to cry,Her eyes seem to only glimmer,
And her mouth is formed into a smile so perfect it seems artificial,
It seems dangerous,
Oh the depths of plastic, the unseen agony of it all.
A false sense of happiness is written across her face,
Masquerading around as if her life was real,
Abusing the terrain she worshiped,
Her reflection in water,
Shows her malfeasance easily, vibrantly in the light.
She seems to glow, but no one but me seems to know.
I pity her, if only she could see her self.
Infidelity tastes so sweet when you have a bitter tongue,
The mirror, the mind, the mouth and I,
All sat down for a cup of tea,
Let’s make small talk and smile awkwardly,
The dirt curls up under my toes, whispering “remember me?”
I looked at her and she looked at me,
I never saw her blink,
But in the blink of an eye,
I could lift it all of her shoulders.
Spin over my shoulder and let her off the hook.
But I think I’ll make her stay there.
I’ll just stand here and look.
the lovley noodels,
Skinny dipping in the mud,
Houses breaking thud, thud. thud.
Goblets shatter,
And cut at my chest,
It doesn’t matter,
It’s just a test,
I know it.
These noodles cover my whole plate,
It drapes right over the side like a curtain
They’ll make me sick,
that’s for certain.
Stuck in a closet,
Locked in a closet.
That strip of light,
That line of light,
My lifeline,
The outline;
Of all things divine,
Wasting time,
Because it’s just life,
Spilling cream,
And pay the price.
Ask me twice and I’ll forget,
Ask me again I haven’t remembered yet.
Of course I have, but I’ll cut you out.
If you ask me what all this is about.
I’ll scream and lie,
And kick and cry.
Until you let me free.
My plate is full,
I’m not at all hungry,
It’s far too much for me.
Noodles and noodles and noodles and noodles,
Drowning me,
Consuming me,
Ridiculously.
I run away they follow me.
Help me,
Save me,
Love me,
Please.
You put your hand out but I cannot reach,
Take me,
I’ll follow you,
I want to,
But I’m too tied up,
I’m too caught up,
Too tangled up,
In these damn noodles.
Houses breaking thud, thud. thud.
Goblets shatter,
And cut at my chest,
It doesn’t matter,
It’s just a test,
I know it.
These noodles cover my whole plate,
It drapes right over the side like a curtain
They’ll make me sick,
that’s for certain.
Stuck in a closet,
Locked in a closet.
That strip of light,
That line of light,
My lifeline,
The outline;
Of all things divine,
Wasting time,
Because it’s just life,
Spilling cream,
And pay the price.
Ask me twice and I’ll forget,
Ask me again I haven’t remembered yet.
Of course I have, but I’ll cut you out.
If you ask me what all this is about.
I’ll scream and lie,
And kick and cry.
Until you let me free.
My plate is full,
I’m not at all hungry,
It’s far too much for me.
Noodles and noodles and noodles and noodles,
Drowning me,
Consuming me,
Ridiculously.
I run away they follow me.
Help me,
Save me,
Love me,
Please.
You put your hand out but I cannot reach,
Take me,
I’ll follow you,
I want to,
But I’m too tied up,
I’m too caught up,
Too tangled up,
In these damn noodles.
Wednesday, May 19, 2010
#7 dark chocolate strawberries
If I close my mouth will someone speak for me?
Will it be different, or simply, me- not speaking.
Every day is a new- confusion,
I’m counting my foot steps, because if not- I’ll lose them.
Moving in circles, but not too fast,
Gotta keep going- gotta stay on track.
If I close my eyes, will someone see for me?
Will it be different, or just me unable to see?
I’ll use a blind fold- maybe?
But it’s so nice outside.
So I’ll just- open my eyes, and
I’ll just- do everything right, and
I’ll just- dream black and white, ‘cause
I know- that’s what you like.
And I think, that the sun is green, and grass- grows from the sky,
Right? Yes. I don’t know why.
I think, I have fifteen toes, and I’ll bend over backwards because, I dropped my nose,
Right? Yes. I don’t know why.
I just always thought that’s how it should be,
If I close my mind will someone think for me?
Will it be different or…?
Will it be different, or simply, me- not speaking.
Every day is a new- confusion,
I’m counting my foot steps, because if not- I’ll lose them.
Moving in circles, but not too fast,
Gotta keep going- gotta stay on track.
If I close my eyes, will someone see for me?
Will it be different, or just me unable to see?
I’ll use a blind fold- maybe?
But it’s so nice outside.
So I’ll just- open my eyes, and
I’ll just- do everything right, and
I’ll just- dream black and white, ‘cause
I know- that’s what you like.
And I think, that the sun is green, and grass- grows from the sky,
Right? Yes. I don’t know why.
I think, I have fifteen toes, and I’ll bend over backwards because, I dropped my nose,
Right? Yes. I don’t know why.
I just always thought that’s how it should be,
If I close my mind will someone think for me?
Will it be different or…?
Wednesday, April 21, 2010
#6 this is a masquerade
Masquerade, everyday new face,
Masquerade, it’s like a game, like a race,
Masquerade, what’s happening behind the mask?
Masquerade, I guess you’ll just- go on- not knowing…
There’s crashing towers,
that’s happening now,
Spilling water,
that’s happening now,
Tipping tables,
that’s happening now,
But I wont let you see,
For this is a masquerade.
Slamming doors,
that’s happening now,
Breaking glass,
that’s happening now,
Screaming children,
that’s happening now,
But you won’t do anything,
For this is a masquerade.
You are trapped behind your cage,
but you put yourself there,
You locked it up
Just right now.
But aren’t we all?
For this is a masquerade.
Turns of pages with boxes, going on forever,
And turns of sand that mound up high until there is no air,
And it’s always a masquerade.
Crimson lips,
Ivory skin,
Golden accents,
And she’s thin,
At her masquerade it’s a party,
Crimson blood stained carpet,
That’s happening now,
Ivory pale skin,
that’s happening now,
“Is she dead?”
Did that happen right now?
But you can’t tell for this is a masquerade.
Violet flowers blossoming there,
Pearly smiles smiling there,
Beautiful voice singing there,
At her masquerade it’s a ball,
Violet bruises all over her body,
that’s happening now,
And she’s crying and crying
that’s happening now,
Go stop her crying,
But you cant
Because this,
Is a masquerade.
Masquerade, put on any face you please,
Masquerade, you can put your mind at ease
Masquerade, don’t you wish the people knew?
What all this masquerading has done,
To you.
Masquerade, it’s like a game, like a race,
Masquerade, what’s happening behind the mask?
Masquerade, I guess you’ll just- go on- not knowing…
There’s crashing towers,
that’s happening now,
Spilling water,
that’s happening now,
Tipping tables,
that’s happening now,
But I wont let you see,
For this is a masquerade.
Slamming doors,
that’s happening now,
Breaking glass,
that’s happening now,
Screaming children,
that’s happening now,
But you won’t do anything,
For this is a masquerade.
You are trapped behind your cage,
but you put yourself there,
You locked it up
Just right now.
But aren’t we all?
For this is a masquerade.
Turns of pages with boxes, going on forever,
And turns of sand that mound up high until there is no air,
And it’s always a masquerade.
Crimson lips,
Ivory skin,
Golden accents,
And she’s thin,
At her masquerade it’s a party,
Crimson blood stained carpet,
That’s happening now,
Ivory pale skin,
that’s happening now,
“Is she dead?”
Did that happen right now?
But you can’t tell for this is a masquerade.
Violet flowers blossoming there,
Pearly smiles smiling there,
Beautiful voice singing there,
At her masquerade it’s a ball,
Violet bruises all over her body,
that’s happening now,
And she’s crying and crying
that’s happening now,
Go stop her crying,
But you cant
Because this,
Is a masquerade.
Masquerade, put on any face you please,
Masquerade, you can put your mind at ease
Masquerade, don’t you wish the people knew?
What all this masquerading has done,
To you.
#5 Biological Changes
Yelling in my ear,
Open minds, empty slate.
Underwater, it’s hotter. But I can breathe easier.
Radiation poisoning, red syringe, bloody knuckles,
Reeking intentions, pointing fingers, acquisitions- that kill me,
Inside the rink, outside this life.
Gag these words from my mouth, these thoughts from my head.
Hide me, keep my quiet. Forget everything.
Those who didn’t listen, are the weak ones.
Open minds, empty slate.
Underwater, it’s hotter. But I can breathe easier.
Radiation poisoning, red syringe, bloody knuckles,
Reeking intentions, pointing fingers, acquisitions- that kill me,
Inside the rink, outside this life.
Gag these words from my mouth, these thoughts from my head.
Hide me, keep my quiet. Forget everything.
Those who didn’t listen, are the weak ones.
Sunday, April 18, 2010
day 4 "Aurora's Revolution"
Apple trees singing of redemption
Umbrellas falling from starving hands,
Running away just to hide my face in a storm,
Olive oil ferments, paint chips off the walls into the air I breath and I cant stop coughing,
Revolution written in blood on every door.
And all the while they tell us to smile.
Men show us the key before locking us up. That’s what we’re getting into I suppose?
Ants seem to understand the world more these days,
Yet I hide in coffins, seek the shelter of cages.
Cleanliness stops mattering when your clothes can’t be washed.
Optimism?
Muffled whispers lull me to sleep, I realize they’re always saying the same thing.
Maybe I’m just being silly.
Enough! Just wake up! Just grow up!
Racing thoughts shake my head, and cant stand up, I don’t want to.
Emptiness fills me up, its enough for me, it has to be.
Even when everything tells me no…
Umbrellas falling from starving hands,
Running away just to hide my face in a storm,
Olive oil ferments, paint chips off the walls into the air I breath and I cant stop coughing,
Revolution written in blood on every door.
And all the while they tell us to smile.
Men show us the key before locking us up. That’s what we’re getting into I suppose?
Ants seem to understand the world more these days,
Yet I hide in coffins, seek the shelter of cages.
Cleanliness stops mattering when your clothes can’t be washed.
Optimism?
Muffled whispers lull me to sleep, I realize they’re always saying the same thing.
Maybe I’m just being silly.
Enough! Just wake up! Just grow up!
Racing thoughts shake my head, and cant stand up, I don’t want to.
Emptiness fills me up, its enough for me, it has to be.
Even when everything tells me no…
#4 "ode to the worry rock"
I cannot over love you, for your purpose is to be loved, be touched, caressed-you are not bothered when I am upset, you are ever consoling, getting my mind relaxed, making me feel at peace- you are constant, in an ever changing world I can always be confident I have something permanent, something I can rely on-you are so real, no batteries, no charge, codes, touch screens, or lights. in a technological world you are my reality, my pure earthly substance-if for a while I leave you, no matter how long, you are always there when I return. when all else pushes me away and I battle the rocky terrain alone you smooth skin reminds me to breath. Its fine. Its alright-no matter how many years I wear u away you take nothing from me.- oh the layers you've lost from me loosing love, oh the time you've spent tenderly taking care of me. you loving me as I loose love, loose money, loose things forever, me loving you as I wear you away and pull it all back together. and I’ll love you and love you and you'll become so very thin, there is no effort, no need for talk, no need to explain. you already know, you read the story on my fingerprints which you have memorized years ago, I touch u and you know, I touch you and let go. my fingers fit perfectly in the groove of your stomach, the curve of your back, the nape of your neck it is all of you. the in sync rhythm we have grown accustom to washes everything out. just as I need it to. and no matter how much I do, I cannot over love you.
Friday, April 9, 2010
Are you afraid of death aurora?
i was reminded today how fragile life is, how real it is. people aren't invincible. people die. which is a crazy thing to think about, especially in the society we live in today which is all about living forever. everybody wants to live forever! we have anti-aging cream and surgical procedures all covering up the inevitable. not prolonging, not posponing, just denying. the truth of the matter which of course is that you will die, in fact we are all sitting here, dieing slowly. it may take 80 years it may take 100 years or it may even take only 12, but the process is never ceasing.
i was asked the question weeks ago "are you afraid of death?" i said no. and i didn't think anyone should be. however i was afraid of not having enough time and leaving the ones i love and not being able to care for them, take care of them, blah blah blah, the usual stuff. but looking at it from another perceptive, fearing the death not of myself but of others. am i afraid of others around me dieing, loved ones of loved ones dieing and seeing them suffer, my own loved ones dieing and suffering myself. i didn't realize how afraid i am of that. there's an hourglass hovering over every one of us. I'm not afraid of mine running out, but theirs? terrified. but how selfish of me not to be afraid of my own, for if theirs runs out think of the suffering i would endure, would theirs not be the same? which also pains me to think about. how could i not fear making them suffer this as well? so i must be right?
a fear of "death" i believer, is similar to that of a fear of the "dark". what is scary about the dark? nothing. we create our own darkness when we close our eyes, in nature the night sky is black and dark. should it not be in our nature to welcome the dark? or at least be used to it? but this fear of the "dark" is more a fear of things in the darkness, the effects of what those things might do, harm you, take you, harm those around you and you won't be able to see, you'll be helpless. just as a fear of death. is death scary? no, a painful death maybe but that would be more a fear of pain rather death. after death you are still, maybe you go to heaven, maybe you reincarnate as a tree, a rock, a flower, maybe you simply decompose. you will feel nothing, no pain, no sadness, you will be free. dead, yes, but free from this devastating life we always complain about. why would you fear that? but fear of the effects of death, the effects on others when you die, the effects on you when they die, fear of time, fear of realization that the life you led wasn't what you wanted. so why not just throw all that together under the one name, the name of the thing that starts up all that ruckus itself? death. or perhaps we should just forget about this completely, as many people do. they ignore it, they don't like to talk about death. these are the people that use a nightlights when they're afraid of the dark. so completely afraid that they can't even bare to think of what might happen won't even admit that they are afraid, just denying it, just making sure that their life is so full of light at all times that maybe they can prevent darkness. maybe then they really won't be scared because there is nothing to be scared of. this is the mindset people have. but, one day you'll realize, as i have; you can't beat this.
so am i afraid of death? shit, i don't even know anymore. yes? no?
maybe I'll just use a nightlight.
i was asked the question weeks ago "are you afraid of death?" i said no. and i didn't think anyone should be. however i was afraid of not having enough time and leaving the ones i love and not being able to care for them, take care of them, blah blah blah, the usual stuff. but looking at it from another perceptive, fearing the death not of myself but of others. am i afraid of others around me dieing, loved ones of loved ones dieing and seeing them suffer, my own loved ones dieing and suffering myself. i didn't realize how afraid i am of that. there's an hourglass hovering over every one of us. I'm not afraid of mine running out, but theirs? terrified. but how selfish of me not to be afraid of my own, for if theirs runs out think of the suffering i would endure, would theirs not be the same? which also pains me to think about. how could i not fear making them suffer this as well? so i must be right?
a fear of "death" i believer, is similar to that of a fear of the "dark". what is scary about the dark? nothing. we create our own darkness when we close our eyes, in nature the night sky is black and dark. should it not be in our nature to welcome the dark? or at least be used to it? but this fear of the "dark" is more a fear of things in the darkness, the effects of what those things might do, harm you, take you, harm those around you and you won't be able to see, you'll be helpless. just as a fear of death. is death scary? no, a painful death maybe but that would be more a fear of pain rather death. after death you are still, maybe you go to heaven, maybe you reincarnate as a tree, a rock, a flower, maybe you simply decompose. you will feel nothing, no pain, no sadness, you will be free. dead, yes, but free from this devastating life we always complain about. why would you fear that? but fear of the effects of death, the effects on others when you die, the effects on you when they die, fear of time, fear of realization that the life you led wasn't what you wanted. so why not just throw all that together under the one name, the name of the thing that starts up all that ruckus itself? death. or perhaps we should just forget about this completely, as many people do. they ignore it, they don't like to talk about death. these are the people that use a nightlights when they're afraid of the dark. so completely afraid that they can't even bare to think of what might happen won't even admit that they are afraid, just denying it, just making sure that their life is so full of light at all times that maybe they can prevent darkness. maybe then they really won't be scared because there is nothing to be scared of. this is the mindset people have. but, one day you'll realize, as i have; you can't beat this.
so am i afraid of death? shit, i don't even know anymore. yes? no?
maybe I'll just use a nightlight.
Sunday, March 28, 2010
#3 life and living
Feel like I’m
Taking out my dirty laundry,
Trying to save what’s left of me,
Now that-
Morning’s come,
And life’s expensive.
I’m not sure but I’ve been thinking,
Conforming thoughts, that you’re all drinking,
Absolution just doesn’t fit my Saturday plans.
When everyone looks silly walking,
I’ll be the one that won’t stop talking,
But of course, I’ll choose my words gracefully.
I dance like a ballerina,
If of course you haven’t seen her,
Late at night, around the time the postman comes.
Slowly slowly let’s speed up now,
Fast faster,
Can’t catch up now.
My heart starts pounding,
And I’m so out of breath.
Now since everything’s out of place,
With distant voices different faces,
I can’t seem to find my way,
‘cause this world’s such a mess.
One man’s trash is another man’s treasure,
And one man’s guilt is another man’s pleasure,
Be comfortable in the water, before you step out to the weather,
Don’t doubt your neighbor but never say never.
You got to fill me up before you can ever feel me down.
Sorry but I already misplaced my white crown.
But I know left is left and I know down is down,
I’m sure if you douse me in champagne,
I’ll promise to keep swimming
If you kiss me in the pool,
I’ll run back to the beginning
Just so you can do it all over again.
Your so smooth with your words,
But I seem to taste molasses,
Stop with all the nonsense,
Your fogging up my glasses,
No I can’t deny it,
For there’s nothing for me to say.
You’ll just hum the day away.
Just to pass the time away,
And that’s why I look forward to our future.
I don’t care what they all told me,
I’ll vindicate you if you just come and hold me.
These stepping stones seem to treat me okay,
If I see fire coming usually I run away.
Yes I know that they’re all talking,
This will not be- easy walking,
But it’s sticks and stones if redemption comes quietly.
Yes I realized that my tongue isn’t fragile,
It just keeps running, with no where to go,
But it always shows up in time for the show,
and it has its moments where it can certainly glow,
But most of the time it’s I told you so,
It’s always yes, almost never no,
But like bears in winter when it’s time to go,
It doesn’t hesitate when it’s season to hibernate,
Then everyone can breathe,
That breathe they’ve been holding tight.
Friends, It may be sort of slippery,
But it will never bite.
Taking out my dirty laundry,
Trying to save what’s left of me,
Now that-
Morning’s come,
And life’s expensive.
I’m not sure but I’ve been thinking,
Conforming thoughts, that you’re all drinking,
Absolution just doesn’t fit my Saturday plans.
When everyone looks silly walking,
I’ll be the one that won’t stop talking,
But of course, I’ll choose my words gracefully.
I dance like a ballerina,
If of course you haven’t seen her,
Late at night, around the time the postman comes.
Slowly slowly let’s speed up now,
Fast faster,
Can’t catch up now.
My heart starts pounding,
And I’m so out of breath.
Now since everything’s out of place,
With distant voices different faces,
I can’t seem to find my way,
‘cause this world’s such a mess.
One man’s trash is another man’s treasure,
And one man’s guilt is another man’s pleasure,
Be comfortable in the water, before you step out to the weather,
Don’t doubt your neighbor but never say never.
You got to fill me up before you can ever feel me down.
Sorry but I already misplaced my white crown.
But I know left is left and I know down is down,
I’m sure if you douse me in champagne,
I’ll promise to keep swimming
If you kiss me in the pool,
I’ll run back to the beginning
Just so you can do it all over again.
Your so smooth with your words,
But I seem to taste molasses,
Stop with all the nonsense,
Your fogging up my glasses,
No I can’t deny it,
For there’s nothing for me to say.
You’ll just hum the day away.
Just to pass the time away,
And that’s why I look forward to our future.
I don’t care what they all told me,
I’ll vindicate you if you just come and hold me.
These stepping stones seem to treat me okay,
If I see fire coming usually I run away.
Yes I know that they’re all talking,
This will not be- easy walking,
But it’s sticks and stones if redemption comes quietly.
Yes I realized that my tongue isn’t fragile,
It just keeps running, with no where to go,
But it always shows up in time for the show,
and it has its moments where it can certainly glow,
But most of the time it’s I told you so,
It’s always yes, almost never no,
But like bears in winter when it’s time to go,
It doesn’t hesitate when it’s season to hibernate,
Then everyone can breathe,
That breathe they’ve been holding tight.
Friends, It may be sort of slippery,
But it will never bite.
Wednesday, March 24, 2010
#2 (you found me)
Buildings made so high,
Like you can’t even see,
Where the tower stops,
But believe me,
It stops,
Writings etched in stone,
Stay years and years and years,
Like it will always stay,
Until it disappears.
Towers made so strong,
Like they will never fall,
The most aggressive warrior
Is the weakest of them all.
Bone’s break,
Steel bends,
Well’s dry
Things end.
Like you can’t even see,
Where the tower stops,
But believe me,
It stops,
Writings etched in stone,
Stay years and years and years,
Like it will always stay,
Until it disappears.
Towers made so strong,
Like they will never fall,
The most aggressive warrior
Is the weakest of them all.
Bone’s break,
Steel bends,
Well’s dry
Things end.
Friday, March 19, 2010
#1 -robotic eyes
Our future is seen through robotic eyes,
The future is built with robotic hands,
And is following readily in robotic footsteps.
Everyone is too tangled up in it’s wires to walk away now.
Their eyes have been covered,
Their hands have been bound,
And while their mouths are freely exposed,
They speak no words.
For they have forgotten how.
The green, melts down into gray.
The moisture drips together,
Down the slanted world into one puddle,
A puddle of black, bubbling, putty,
That melts the ground around it,
Below it,
The air above it.
Until it is there is only thick black darkness.
And absolute silence,
Besides the constant buzz of the machine.
If one could only open their eyes,
Perhaps the darkness would go away.
But of course,
The world is seen through robotic eyes.
The future is built with robotic hands,
And is following readily in robotic footsteps.
Everyone is too tangled up in it’s wires to walk away now.
Their eyes have been covered,
Their hands have been bound,
And while their mouths are freely exposed,
They speak no words.
For they have forgotten how.
The green, melts down into gray.
The moisture drips together,
Down the slanted world into one puddle,
A puddle of black, bubbling, putty,
That melts the ground around it,
Below it,
The air above it.
Until it is there is only thick black darkness.
And absolute silence,
Besides the constant buzz of the machine.
If one could only open their eyes,
Perhaps the darkness would go away.
But of course,
The world is seen through robotic eyes.
Tuesday, March 9, 2010
fishbowl (pink)
Blossoms weave their vines round and round my hand,
Completely silent, just breath.
Yours and mine, intertwined.
Like a windstorm, intense and dangerous.
But almost a playful breeze.
Penetrate my soul,
Completely, feel me.
Pink silk,
Surrounding me,
Caressing my skin,
Keeping up a rhythm,
Like the heart beat of two lovers.
Beating, beating,
Like the drums of war,
Tearing at my flesh,
Ripping out my heart,
Just to bring me back to life.
There’s vanilla beaches,
Pink sunsets,
In paradise
Completely silent, just breath.
Yours and mine, intertwined.
Like a windstorm, intense and dangerous.
But almost a playful breeze.
Penetrate my soul,
Completely, feel me.
Pink silk,
Surrounding me,
Caressing my skin,
Keeping up a rhythm,
Like the heart beat of two lovers.
Beating, beating,
Like the drums of war,
Tearing at my flesh,
Ripping out my heart,
Just to bring me back to life.
There’s vanilla beaches,
Pink sunsets,
In paradise
Monday, March 8, 2010
fishbowl (skedaddle) "there is only love here."
There is only love here.
Welcome to this world,
where up is down,
An down is up,
Where you drink from a plate,
And eat from a cup.
This place knows no time,
And time has no end,
Understand my friend,
This whole world,
Is pretend.
And there is only love here.
Skedaddle your way into this make believe,
Into this Neverland.
Skip your way across the sky,
Don’t be shy I’ll hold your hand.
Don’t be afraid,
There’s no need here.
We’re all smiles,
There is no fear.
There is only love here.
Just trust us all,
Just come have fun.
We’re here for you,
For all of you.
Outside it’s raining,
Raining bricks.
It’s cold outside,
It’s damp outside,
Don’t go outside,
We’re here,
Right now,
And there’s only love.
Don’t turn your back on those you love,
Don’t question the reasons of my love,
Don’t run away from my love,
Embrace my love,
Return my love,
You are my love,
My love.
Nonsensical, irreplaceable, indefinable love,
that’s what’s here.
that’s where we are.
Don’t believe me?
Ask the stars,
Yes, they talk and so does the sky,
Feeling down? Why don’t you fly?
I know you can, I believe in you.
Look around, we all do too.
Because here, we all love you.
Just jump right off that ledge and go,
that’s all you need when you’re here you know.
If you need some help,
I’ll give you a nudge.
It’s so beautiful in this wonderland,
And it’s so quiet,
Until every so often...
But no one cares,
Because there’s all smiles,
There’s only smiles.
And there’s no questions,
And there’s no doubt,
In with the good, and push the bad out.
Smile my children,
There’s never need for tears,
Smile my children,
There’s only love here.
Welcome to this world,
where up is down,
An down is up,
Where you drink from a plate,
And eat from a cup.
This place knows no time,
And time has no end,
Understand my friend,
This whole world,
Is pretend.
And there is only love here.
Skedaddle your way into this make believe,
Into this Neverland.
Skip your way across the sky,
Don’t be shy I’ll hold your hand.
Don’t be afraid,
There’s no need here.
We’re all smiles,
There is no fear.
There is only love here.
Just trust us all,
Just come have fun.
We’re here for you,
For all of you.
Outside it’s raining,
Raining bricks.
It’s cold outside,
It’s damp outside,
Don’t go outside,
We’re here,
Right now,
And there’s only love.
Don’t turn your back on those you love,
Don’t question the reasons of my love,
Don’t run away from my love,
Embrace my love,
Return my love,
You are my love,
My love.
Nonsensical, irreplaceable, indefinable love,
that’s what’s here.
that’s where we are.
Don’t believe me?
Ask the stars,
Yes, they talk and so does the sky,
Feeling down? Why don’t you fly?
I know you can, I believe in you.
Look around, we all do too.
Because here, we all love you.
Just jump right off that ledge and go,
that’s all you need when you’re here you know.
If you need some help,
I’ll give you a nudge.
It’s so beautiful in this wonderland,
And it’s so quiet,
Until every so often...
But no one cares,
Because there’s all smiles,
There’s only smiles.
And there’s no questions,
And there’s no doubt,
In with the good, and push the bad out.
Smile my children,
There’s never need for tears,
Smile my children,
There’s only love here.
fishbowl "sunshine"
The heavy drops splash down upon my skin,
The wet atmosphere closes in on me,
Suffocating me,
The moist air haunting my every move,
Following me,
Damp breaths choke me,
But I wont stop breathing.
And I still smile,
Because of,
My sunshine.
The darkness of night forms a bubble around me,
Isolating me.
The blackness confuses me,
Distorting my emotions,
My senses.
The eerie moonlight no longer comforts me,
Nor allows me to rest,
But sends shivers up my spine,
Like two electric eels winding their way up my body.
But still I smile,
Because of,
My sunshine.
Cold winter air bites at my cheeks,
I can‘t even see my hands in front of my face,
Everything is white,
Completely white,
Blank world,
Cloudy skies and overcast soaks up all the light,
But still my heart is warm,
And still I smile,
Because of,
My sunshine,
My rocks are gone,
And its my fault.
I just drive them all away.
I’m stuck inside empty boxes,
Completely Empty, empty boxes.
Cardboard boxes,
But they’re all too tough to let me out,
Empty boxes I can’t fill up.
All by myself,
But still I feel love,
And still I smile,
Because of,
My sunshine.
Through the dead of night,
In the heart of the storm of winter,
All by myself,
Against the world,
I’ll smile.
And I’ll wait here for;
My sunshine.
The wet atmosphere closes in on me,
Suffocating me,
The moist air haunting my every move,
Following me,
Damp breaths choke me,
But I wont stop breathing.
And I still smile,
Because of,
My sunshine.
The darkness of night forms a bubble around me,
Isolating me.
The blackness confuses me,
Distorting my emotions,
My senses.
The eerie moonlight no longer comforts me,
Nor allows me to rest,
But sends shivers up my spine,
Like two electric eels winding their way up my body.
But still I smile,
Because of,
My sunshine.
Cold winter air bites at my cheeks,
I can‘t even see my hands in front of my face,
Everything is white,
Completely white,
Blank world,
Cloudy skies and overcast soaks up all the light,
But still my heart is warm,
And still I smile,
Because of,
My sunshine,
My rocks are gone,
And its my fault.
I just drive them all away.
I’m stuck inside empty boxes,
Completely Empty, empty boxes.
Cardboard boxes,
But they’re all too tough to let me out,
Empty boxes I can’t fill up.
All by myself,
But still I feel love,
And still I smile,
Because of,
My sunshine.
Through the dead of night,
In the heart of the storm of winter,
All by myself,
Against the world,
I’ll smile.
And I’ll wait here for;
My sunshine.
day 3 "the spider"
Yesterday I befriended a spider. It’s venom was impossible, which challenged me. It’s skin was like midnight, which intrigued me. And it’s heart was so mysterious, it mesmerized me. Luring me into it’s trap? No. For I had a trap of my own. But a different trap than you might expect, for my trap is not hidden in the darkness of the shadows, but publicly in the light. Maybe we can trap each other. My venom is not poison, but addictive, and I will not kill you, but I will keep you forever, and turn you into one of my own. So I fluttered my wings and flew around in the sun showing not the slightest bit of fear. It confused the spider, and was instantly as mesmerized as I. I was gentle, I moved slowly, but I never lost sight of what I wanted. The spider. To be mine. Forever. Why? I had so many others who belonged to me, all of which seemed meaningless now, for this one was different, it held a sort of amazement I couldn’t explain. And I’d like to believe the spider felt so to. And at that moment when the spider gave in, when the spider confessed it’s amazement with me as well, the universe shifted. Two opposing forces both with a sense of wonder, a sense of extreme curiosity, which ended in two completely enraptured powers captivated by one another sheerly because of the differences that made them so incredibly similar. A flame so fantastic it could burn past the retina and into the skulls of every human blinding them all but me and this spider, who were possibly the blind ones this whole time. Or the flame could be so gigantic that no person actually bears witness to it, for we are all living within that flame so we do not notice what is right in front of us, or rather surrounding us completely. In an instant we had set the world on fire, blinding all who resided in it, and in the next instant, the spider had spun a web and hurried away into the sunlight. For the heat of the flame was too intense, the amazement was too fantastic, and it was all a little bit… intimidating.
But my hunger still remains, I have felt that ecstasy if only for a moment it was a moment too long. Perhaps some of my own venom had penetrated one score too far and found it’s way into my internal functions and I myself have become addicted, addicted to the state of euphoria I had been introduced to. In retrospect, the only thing I regret, is not doing away with that spider when I had the chance. While it has opened new doors and allowed
me to see but not quite understand these new found sectors of godly elation, it has ruined me. Who would have thought that the one thing that was once my everything, could have turned me into nothing? Or rather who wouldn’t have thought that? So now I’ll just sit here in the shadows waiting for that flame to come and burn it all away…again.
But my hunger still remains, I have felt that ecstasy if only for a moment it was a moment too long. Perhaps some of my own venom had penetrated one score too far and found it’s way into my internal functions and I myself have become addicted, addicted to the state of euphoria I had been introduced to. In retrospect, the only thing I regret, is not doing away with that spider when I had the chance. While it has opened new doors and allowed
me to see but not quite understand these new found sectors of godly elation, it has ruined me. Who would have thought that the one thing that was once my everything, could have turned me into nothing? Or rather who wouldn’t have thought that? So now I’ll just sit here in the shadows waiting for that flame to come and burn it all away…again.
day 2 "wishing for waffles"
Day 2
I wish I was a robot, a computer, a waffle.
but of course I got landed with Spaghetti..
why That of all things?
perhaps if I wasn’t spaghetti I would be a basket.
which is just as bad really.
how does one get rid of the noodles?
eat it.
plain and simple.
now more and more noodles start falling onto my plate,
I’m beginning to notice the absence of my penny.
I miss it..
and spare change does nothing more than weigh down my pockets.
even the flowers in my garden,
that have always withstanded Everything from winter to drought,
are disappearing.
they are getting picked right Out from the roots.
so all I’m left with is an empty yard
and a plate of noodles..
I wish I was a robot, a computer, a waffle.
but of course I got landed with Spaghetti..
why That of all things?
perhaps if I wasn’t spaghetti I would be a basket.
which is just as bad really.
how does one get rid of the noodles?
eat it.
plain and simple.
now more and more noodles start falling onto my plate,
I’m beginning to notice the absence of my penny.
I miss it..
and spare change does nothing more than weigh down my pockets.
even the flowers in my garden,
that have always withstanded Everything from winter to drought,
are disappearing.
they are getting picked right Out from the roots.
so all I’m left with is an empty yard
and a plate of noodles..
Day 1 "my penny"
one time I had a penny.
I loved my penny so much.
it was so shiny.
I always kept it in my purse, or in my pocket.
one day I was walking and I tripped and it flew out of my pocket to the other side of the road..
if only I could return to a moment ago..
when it was safely nestled in my pocket.but that moment is gone.
I want it back,
that moment, my penny.
All of it.
I miss it.
but it is inanimate,
it does not want me,
miss me,
or even notice I’m gone.
nor did it notice it was ever with me in the first place.
what am I to do now?
cross the street?
the street is far too wide.
there are far too many cars.
but what if somebody else takes it?
should I sit here and do nothing?
but then again...
it's just a penny.
I loved my penny so much.
it was so shiny.
I always kept it in my purse, or in my pocket.
one day I was walking and I tripped and it flew out of my pocket to the other side of the road..
if only I could return to a moment ago..
when it was safely nestled in my pocket.but that moment is gone.
I want it back,
that moment, my penny.
All of it.
I miss it.
but it is inanimate,
it does not want me,
miss me,
or even notice I’m gone.
nor did it notice it was ever with me in the first place.
what am I to do now?
cross the street?
the street is far too wide.
there are far too many cars.
but what if somebody else takes it?
should I sit here and do nothing?
but then again...
it's just a penny.
So Basically...
I've been working on three projects, almost simultaneously. One of them is done. It's a book of 100 poems, which i will post on here. The book is called "Open to Interpretation" because all of my poems can be taken ore than one way, in fact possibly infinite interpretations as there is a slightly different one to each reader. Which is one of the things i love about poetry. There's no wrong answer, there's not right and wrong, it's just raw feeling, emotion, in rhythmic form. Beautiful.
Also i've been working on another book "Up to You" which has the same concept as the first one. The third project is called "fishbowl". And yes, it literally inculdes a fish bowl. I had a bunch of people write a three words on little slips of paper fold them up and put them in the fishbowl and periodically I would draw one out and use it either in a poem or for inspiration for one.
When I first started writing these, it was mostly just for fun. To keep me busy over a boring summer break. But writing these books has done so much more for me. I was constantly looking for inspiration, in anything. I was always thinking of how I could talk about something without actually saying it, or rewording what was trying to be said. I was finding metaphors and symbolism everywhere. It made me see the whole word through poetry. Everything I saw was an opportunity, and I heard the voice in everything. Suddenly leaves in a tree being blown around wasn’t wind to me anymore, it was the tree singing me it’s summer song. It made me so much more in touch with every emotion. These poems are thoughts of mine, views of mine, and basically served as a diary for an amount of time of my life. I speak through my own voice, as well as through the voice of others telling a different story. Each one of these poems is my baby.
I hope you enjoy them.(:
Also i've been working on another book "Up to You" which has the same concept as the first one. The third project is called "fishbowl". And yes, it literally inculdes a fish bowl. I had a bunch of people write a three words on little slips of paper fold them up and put them in the fishbowl and periodically I would draw one out and use it either in a poem or for inspiration for one.
When I first started writing these, it was mostly just for fun. To keep me busy over a boring summer break. But writing these books has done so much more for me. I was constantly looking for inspiration, in anything. I was always thinking of how I could talk about something without actually saying it, or rewording what was trying to be said. I was finding metaphors and symbolism everywhere. It made me see the whole word through poetry. Everything I saw was an opportunity, and I heard the voice in everything. Suddenly leaves in a tree being blown around wasn’t wind to me anymore, it was the tree singing me it’s summer song. It made me so much more in touch with every emotion. These poems are thoughts of mine, views of mine, and basically served as a diary for an amount of time of my life. I speak through my own voice, as well as through the voice of others telling a different story. Each one of these poems is my baby.
I hope you enjoy them.(:
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